Gas or Electric?

I noticed the double-A battery in the passenger seat, probably fallen out of the camera bag. I thought about taking it into the house when I got home. But then, I think about lots of things that are quickly forgotten. I parked the car and ran inside to see what was for dinner. The battery spent the night alone.

The next day I was out with my family running some evening errands. It was the end of a long day and we were all out of steam. When I shut the engine off, nobody moved. After hours of perpetual motion, no one was eager to start hauling sacks of groceries up the stairs to the house. We contented ourselves to enjoying the absence of noise and activity.

Then my wife let one rip and suddenly all of our lethargy was killed with the motivation to escape the polluted environment. Doors opened and bodies spilled out, deciding that unloading the groceries was the better of two fates.

As usual, the six-year-old was the slowest to exit. As she pushed the door shut, she noticed the forgotten battery sitting in the passenger seat. The battery: $1. The groceries: $75. My daughter's next words: priceless.

"Wow! Mom pooped a battery!"

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P.S. I should thank my wife for being a good enough sport to let me share that story. As far as I know, that's the only time she's ever "broke wind". ;P